The Bird Dance - 1992

My whole life I have been clairvoyant. Since I was younger I have talked to numerous wise old dead people in my head. Sometimes I’ve even seen some of those people at the foot of my bed at 3 am in the morning in a pitch-black room. I’ve seen them like I would see you, so real I could reach out and touch them. It’s also very important to tell you that my parents have always been very supportive of me seeing and talking to these wonderful wise old dead people who have a great sense of humor (the reason I know that is they spend a lot of time chuckling away at myself). My farther has been a UFO researcher for the last 55 years and my mother is an ecliptic open person who’s is an incredibly intuitive lady.

I’m am 41 years old and 9 years ago some of the peculiar things that happen to me in my life sudden took turn into epic portions. 

I was visiting a friend down in Hunnington Beach California USA, October of 1990. I was sleeping in his guest room when something started to stir out of the closet. I got up and couched down in the corner of the room because I was so scared. (I wasn’t in the dream and I wasn’t awake. I seem to be in the in-between place, in the room but things where the same and different.)

This huge White Bird came floating out of the closet some 10ft high. I never saw her spread her wings but I’m sure she would have had a 20ft wingspan. Her energy was so intense that it made me shake.  I had a good sense about her but still being in that room with her was an indescribable experience. Her energy was so immense it took my breath away. I shook visually as she approached and all I could do was to lift and finger to touch her wing as she lifted it to me.

 I looked up to her face but it was all burred out.  She turned and moved to the vanity, with a mirror (that wasn’t in the room in the real world) and on her left shoulder was this huge White Eagle. I stood up and walked up behind her grabbed her shoulders and yelled, “Who are you!” It was at this moment that I woke up, from the dream into the real world.

A month or so after this I returned home to Vancouver Canada and six months after that I went on a vision quest (alone) up a mountain. When I left all of my First Nation friends looked at me like I wasn’t going to come back alive. I climb up to the lake (some 1500 ft above sea level) and in the course of 5 nights 6 days had some amazing life changing experiences. One of the more important events is that I open a doorway that had been closed for almost over 4000 years and out poured all this white light. It is still pouring out even now as I tell you this. I thought that this had some significance but really didn’t realize how much or why until years later.

In Sept. of 1991 I was waiting for the Skytrain (monorail) to pick me up at the Edmonds Station. It was approx. 4:00 PM the platform was prerush hour and nobody was there except for me. When a First Nations voice (from outside of my head, from above and to my right) started talking to me. He said, “You will build a bird. It will be 10 ft by 5 ft, it will be all white and you will go dance in Hopi Land.” I looked straight up to where that voice was coming from. I was astounded, “What?”  Without out so much a pause, the voice answers, “You will build a bird. It will be 10 ft by 5ft, it will be all white and you will go dance in Hopi Land.”

 | sat there dumb founded, “What?” Again came the answer, “You will build a bird. It will be 10ft by 5 ft, it will be all white...”  “No.” I said. The voice continued on again “You will build a bird, it will be.....” “No.” I said again. “You will.” “No, I won’t. I am not going to build a white bird that’s 10ft by 5ft and take myself, my white anglo self down to a place where they have had at least 300 years of white tyranny and dance as big white bird! It’ll be a turkey shoot. No I won’t do it.” There was a little bit of silent and then the voice answer again with, “You will build a bird, it will be 10ft....”

I couldn’t believe this guy. “No. Go get yourself another white boy cause I ain’t doing it!” I was getting irritated with this fellow. “You will.” And stubborn boy was he stubborn well I was going to have some wise old dead guy who I’d never heard before send me down to a place where I wouldn’t be well received even at the best of times. “No.” I said. And then we argued back and forth. “You will do it.”  “No I won’t.” “You will.” “I won’t” “You will.” The Skytrain came and that was the end of that.

Until I mentioned the story to a Co-Salish friend of mine Si’Taxulwood. (Now I don’t think that all First Nations people are seeing in fact there not but some are and I have been very lucky to know a few of them.) She took the story in and didn’t say anything again until some time later. We were driving down the backcountry of the Sqaumish river valley when "Si’Taxulwood turned to me quite casually and said, “When do you think you’ll dance?” I looked at her a little perturbed and thought that I would tell her a date so far off in the distance that no one will remember, they all forget and I’ll be left in peace. “Before the end of 93.” Little did I know that I had just sealed my fate? "Si’Taxulwood sure new what she was doing however, that sly wonderful women.

Years had past and I had totally forgotten what I had said to her. Not that I am in the habit of not keeping promises or that I lie to people, I’m not, I don’t, however I definitely didn’t think that anyone was listening. Nor did I ever think I would be held to something said so off the cuff in a causal conversation. Well I was soooo wrong.

I was visiting a friend one night and we where all sitting in the living room talking when my friends wife and I started to spontaneously travel. Like a dream journey but when you are wide awake. The next thing I know we are down in the Midwest of America on the banks of the Mississippi River talking to these 14 Old First Nations guys (who I’ve never met) and they’re talking to her about something. When we get back 30 minutes later she tells me, “They want to know why I haven’t kept my promise?” I was absolutely dumb struck. I had no idea what the hell they where talking about.

I mean I’m the type of person that keeps almost all of his promises, if they’re reasonable requests. So when "Si’Taxulwood reminded me of what I said three years ago.  I caved. My plan was a total blow out. The only person, who managed to forget, was me.

I made the Big White Bird in record time, to the surprise of my farther. He kept asking, “How do you know how to make a bird? Have you ever made one before? Do you have a blueprint, or a plan or something?” I just knew. It was something inside of me. I thought about it for a while and then I made it. I’m an Artist, were supposed to be able to do that. Aren’t we? So the bird was made, my farther was speechless, and I had brought my train ticket and it was the cheapest way to get to Winslow Arizona USA.

Just as I was about to leave my mother hugs me and says, “Oh, john dear, I know you think your going down there and sit in a motel for 6 days but...” and then suddenly Mum’s voice gets this strange echoy sound to it, like it was coming from some far off distant place. “....I SEE YOU DANCING ON RED ROCK.” I stand there in shock. She gives me another huge quickly and says, “ I know you didn’t want to hear that but DANCE AND THEY WILL COME.”  I was totally stunned now. “Mum,” I said, “ This is not the field of dreams for crying out loud. Why did you have to go and say that?” “I know dear I’m sorry but DANCE AND THEY WILL COME.’

It was December 18th 1993 and I was heading to spend Xmas alone on some Mesa some where, on a Hopi Reservation, who’s people I presumed (and for good reason) would not be welcoming my little white self with open arms. I was less than thrilled. Before I had left Vancouver Canada I had asked my friend if I should notify someone that I was coming. She said that they already know and not to worry. Uncle JimmyJimmy, who is "Si’Taxulwood Uncle, just told me not to loose my head as he tapped me by my ear and laughed. So when I arrived on the mesa and started telling the story to some kindly Hopi young people they suggested to me not to tell my story to the elders because they’d throw me in jail.

Then I met this interesting German woman who listened to my story and told me not to worry that she was in very tight with the elders and she would tell them for me. That made me worry even more. When she arrived back to the motel some hours later she instructed me that the elders would be by to visit within the next 5 days. I waited two days without a sign of any elders and I also had this sinking, dropping feeling in the pit of my intuitive stomach which said, “Now really if you where a native Hopi elder and that German lady came by to talk to you and share your story what would you do?”

I started packing up. I did show the bird to one Hopi person named Violet. She owned a jewelry store close to the motel and she was a kindly person. I found out later that her own people called her a witch. (I find that fear and ignorance make people say some pretty bizarre stuff.) She was quite impressed and told me that she would let me dance but the elders would see and I would get thrown in jail. Enough Jail stuff I was out of there. I hitched a ride with this Car salesman Richard Impalitor who asked me where I was going. I told him I was going to the Grand Canyon the next thing I know he’s telling me to go dance a “CHIVAS ROCK” In that same strange from the ether voice that my Mum has. So I thank him and head down to Sedonna Arizona USA.

In Sedonna I was talking to this guy on how to get to Chivas Rock. When someone from behind keeps tapping me on the shoulder. When I turn around I am looking at this guy with a long beard who keeps saying to me, “I’ll take you any where you want to go.”

I climb in the car with John Buck and we head off too Chivas Rock some 20 minutes out of town.  I am down to the wire at this point, with only few days to go before my dead line. And now because everyone had told me that they’d throw me in jail if I dance well hell I’m going to dance now come Hell or high water. I’m mad now. Well not to mad but I came to do something and I was going to do it.

I found out from talking to John Buck that he too was on a walk about and he knew the moment he step into the info building that he had to take me anywhere I wanted to go. Now I didn’t tell anyone but before I had left Vancouver I had felt that I was finally going home.

When John Buck and I rounded the corner and enter the valley my whole heart surged with excitement because I was home. At that precise moment John Buck leaned over to me and said “Welcome Home.” Jesus I thought this man is uncanny.

We arrived at the Rock; I took out my big drum and showed John Buck how to play her. “When I dance slow, beat slowly, when I dance fast, beat quickly.” I threw some herbs put on the bird with the mask and was ready to go. “Remember” John mused, “If it’s anything it’ll be good entertainment.” We both laughed.

I started to dance and sing as best I could, traveling in a counter clockwise direction. Now it’s mighty hard to sing under that thing but that’s what I thought at the time I was supposed to do. It makes it pretty hard to breathe. I’ve taken dance lessons before and I’ve seen a few Pow Wows so I thought I would let my heart go and see what happens. Follow my instincts.

I was going around the circle for the third time when I had just turn to the east and then wind pick up my wings. Then next thing that happened is that out from the sky came this huge Jolt/bolt of electricity right in between my solar plexis in my chest. It made me jump, hop, dance like a crazy man. It was so intense I nearly leapt off the ground after the initial jolt. Like 1000 volts of electricity was coursing through my body. After I was done I knelt breathless on the ground looking up to Chivas Rock and I thought to myself that I had danced on that Huge Red Rock just like my mother had predicted. Then John Buck comes to me and says,” See that Red Rock?” I nod as he continues, “I saw you dance up there.”

Over the course of a few days with John Buck I found out that he was placing the “Keys of Eknoc” into the ground around the world and he was almost done. In this book he was telling me about it says that when the keys are all placed the “White Bird will come.”

This was getting too freakkin wild even for myself. I tell you I was sooooo believing in spiritual intervention. I have always but now, then, wow, it was all happening boom, boom, and boom.

John Buck dropped me off at the Flagstaff Am track train station heading to Los Angles. I sat down by this lady who asked me what was in my big duffel bag. I told her that I had a dream to dance in Hopi land so I came down to do just that. I was very tired at that time and told her quite quickly without the usual dramatic flare. She looked at me and said, “You won’t believe this but I have this friend in Minnesota and he’s been having the same dream but he has to dance in Navajo land.” My jaw hit the ground as my mum’s voice echoed inside my head “DANCE AND THEY WILL COME.”   “Where did you dance she asked?”  “Chivas Rock” I sputtered as I ran for the train. “Tell him to dance at Chivas Rock.”

I got to Los Angles and stayed at my friends place for the night and then the next day headed up to Seattle. I was sitting by myself when this Australian girl sat down beside me.

There was this family there and for some reason we started to talk about ESP and I told them I could tell what was up with a person just by holding their hands.  The mom wanted a demo so I took her hands and talked about 10 different things ending with “Oh, and you’ve sold your house and bought a new house on the other side of the tracks but you and your husband haven’t told the kids you’d thought you’d wait until you got home.” Well the kids looked at their mom then me then back to mom. Mom’s face goes slack as she explains that she wanted to tell them but that they thought it be best to wait until after the visit with Grandma.

Suddenly the Australian girl (her name escapes me at the moment for some reason) gives me her hands and asks me to do it with her. So I hold her hands in mine. She pulls them away and then tells me that her head, chest, pelvis, and hands are on fire. I apologize saying that this wasn’t something that usually happened. She looks at me and says, “I going to tell you something but I think you might think its crazy.” Then she proceeds to tell me. “I think I’m this Huge Bird.” “How big is the wing span?” I ask. “Oh I don’t know, ah 10ft by 5ft.” Again I’m just speechless. “But you know the really crazy thing is that I think I’m this huge White Bird.” Now this young lady boarded the train late. In fact she almost missed it. So she didn’t see me with my luggage, which sat in the compartment 40 feet away on the first floor of the train. For the next 18 hours I told her as much as I could about what I knew about the White Bird.

 

When I arrived back in Vancouver Canada nothing much happened for another 6 months and then one night I was woken up by the Big White Bird from the in-between place. I got up the next day and took the bird to Aunty Nora’s and she invited me to dance in the Capilano Pow Wow. I was worried they where going to hurt me if I did that but she assured me that “We Squamish people we nice people.”

So in late August of 1994 I put on the bird and began to dance in the “All nations dance.” When I put on the bird I am totally covered and the mask has a shroud so it’s impossible to tell who I am. I started to dance that day and as I went around the circle the gossip hubbub was like a loud wave following me. I thought at that moment that the whole thing was one big mistake and I was going to take the whole thing off and give it all up. Well when I got to the north, where the elders sit, three children jumped into my arms and for the next three days 15 to 20 children followed me every time I went out. On the last day the elders honor me with my own dance.

For the next 3 to 4 years I dance in approx. 12 Pow Wow in front of some 30,000 people and every time that I went out 15 to 20 children would follow me. At the end of the third year Aunty Nora dies and the next time I dance in the Capilano Pow Wow they ask me to leave. So I did without a fuss. It was never my attention to scare anyone and it seemed they were pretty bothered about something. I head up to talk to Uncle Jake and he tells me “That blanket you wear is strong, if you red it’d be okay but you white. You should go dance in the bush.”

I’ve been dancing in the bush/forest for the last 8 years. Every 3 to 5 months I take the bird and with some wonderful friends we go to a nearby forest and I/the Bird, we dance. She’s changed over the years as I’ve learned more about her. It’s not a native dance of America first nations peoples, no it’s more global, and for me it has Celtic origins. The only reason I thought it was First Nations in the beginning was because of its feathers but if we were in Austrialia the dance would be with the aboriginals, and if it was in Sweden it would be with the Laplanders and so on.

It is a dance of old medicine and the culture that most connects to that, will draw the bird to them.  My friend Fraiser plays the celtic drum, Di the alto recorder and may bring a guitar, Jill my wife plays a native drum and sings occasionally and soon Beau will come with his drum and Alex with her pin whistle. This is a dance of creative spontaneity. A dance of the heart, for all hearts, of every nation, from every place.

This is a dance to awaken the ancestors. Not just our human ancestors but deeper, further back, from the stars, from the red plant (no not mars) and from the blue planet in another place from another time to awaken the bird, the thunderbird, the griffin, phoenix, to bring back the fire, to spark the dream and the dreamers. To help guide the “Children of Hope’’ like water rushing down the river.

I am looking for you are you looking for me? If you or anyone you know is having extreme unusual experiences and dreams of having to dance as a huge bird of any color, please don’t hesitate to contact me.  Or if you read this and prefer to go to Chivas Rock and dance, all the power to you. When you’ve done it, I’d love to hear how it went, your experiences and your stories. And if you’ve already danced I’d love to hear your impression and stories.  I am looking to listen.

Duende (c)